Hope was lying on the floor one day when, unprovoked, Ioane walked across the house and deliberately stepped on her head. From then on he started a pattern of regular violence towards Hope that she came to realise coincided with when he was angry with other things, such as the Manu team losing or if he had simply had a bad day. Hope continued to put up with the verbal abuse until one day she was sat down having prepared dinner for Ioane and his family when he came home drunk with his relatives. As he passed her Hope felt something hit her on the head. “I was in shock. I just sat there until I felt blood trickling down my forehead. I realized he was holding a half bottle as it cracked from hitting my head! I saw my son standing there with fear in his eyes looking at me. No-one said anything.” For Hope that was the final straw and she gathered up her son and fled the family house. She chose to remain quiet to protect the public image of her husband but later heard how he had boasted that he had fasi (hit) Hope because she deserved it. Hope decided to file for a divorce but Ioane continued to threaten her. Despite this, she continued with the divorce and is now separated. *Names changed to protect the identities of those involved. Hope’s story highlights a number of important characteristics of IPV which were present in many of the cases heard by the Inquiry. The first point is to reaffirm that IPV, as with all forms of violence, is about power and control. They are not about disobedience, as the Inquiry has already outlined in relation to violence against children. Hope had done nothing more than make the family dinner on the night Ioane hit her on the head with a bottle. Furthermore, we must start to come to adopt the mindset that nothing excuses violent behaviour. Secondly, Hope’s experience demonstrates the similar nature of IPV to violence against children in that physical and verbal abuse are often linked and the impact of verbal abuse can be just as bad or worse than physical harm. Thirdly, Hope was not treated as an equal in the household and was abused by her in-laws as well as her husband. The issue of inter-family violence and the position of nofotanes (married women living with their husband’s family) will be discussed in section 7.2.4. Finally, Hope’s abuse was witnessed by her child and this is not uncommon either. What is more uncommon is an understanding of the impact of witnessing such abuse as briefly mentioned early in the Report and will be dealt further when considering the impacts of IPV in section 9.2.