Myth 8: Women are obliged to have sex with their husbands once they are married Reality: The Crimes Act 201325 removes the specific exemption of marital rape contained within the Crimes Ordinance 1961. This means that rape within a marriage is a criminal offence, punishable by up to life in prison. Marital rape is a crime in Samoa and amounts to inhuman treatment under the Constitution or human rights and is totally contrary to the Fa’asamoa. It is often part of a pattern of violent and abusive behaviour, as in the case of Destiny. The Report has highlighted time again how the Fa’asamoa is based on the principles of reciprocity and mutuality. There is a strong and valid reason for this and it is because those very values lose all meaning if they are only demanded and not offered in return. How is the protection of any person, spiritual or physical, going to be sustainable if that person demands it at the expense of the same for others? Marital rape is one of the most severe violations of the Fa’asamoa and of the principle of mutuality, respect, protection and love. Therefore, widespread understanding of marital rape is required to ensure the coercive nature of this type of behaviour is recognized and addressed. Case Study 14: Eteuati Ete, the Laughing Samoan26 Eteuati is one half of ‘the Laughing Samoans’, a much loved comedy duo who have been putting a smile on people’s faces for years. He also used to beat his wife, Mele. “There was a violent side to Ete,” Mele says. “But to the rest of the world he was this charming, effervescent person.” During their marriage there were several violent incidents, including once when Eteuati punched Mele in the face while she was driving, leaving her with a severely swollen black eye. The couple stayed together but lived apart for several years before reconciling and once Eteuati has overcome his violent past. This has only been possible through his acknowledgement that the violence was as a result of his desire to control Mele. “Publicly, people thought I was a funny guy, a great guy. But privately I was a guy with anger issues. I thought I’m going to be a really sad old man, if I continue to live in a controlling and violent way.” 25 See section 49(4) of the Crimes Act 2013. Jared Nicoll. “Laughing Samoan confesses to his secret past as a wife-beater.” (21 November 2017). Stuff NZ. Retrieved from https://www.stuff.co.nz/national/98722131/laughing-samoan-confesses-to-his-secret-past-as-a-wifebeater. Accessed 13 March 2018. 26