Families of detainees are usually stigmatized and automatically seen as closely linked to criminals. A detained mother recalled, “’Yung panganay ko na nagtatrabaho sa bangko natakot na baka matanggal siya sa trabaho ’pag nalaman na nakakulong ang nanay niya (My eldest who works at a bank feared getting fired if it was learned that I was in jail).” Another participant from the Davao Penal Colony shared that her child is a graduate of criminology, but because she is a convicted felon, the child was not accepted by the Philippine National Police. In general, accounts from the women show how incarceration has affected family ties and the women’s relationships, especially with their children. They also show how women deprived of liberty strive to comply with traditional gender roles and how they deal with frustration at failing to perform these roles during detention or heartbreak from being rejected by their own children. Older children of detainees are left to support themselves with the added burden of supporting their imprisoned parents. Due to the neglect that children of imprisoned mothers feel, some start to resent their mothers and avoid communicating with them. A participant lamented, “Lumaki ang anak ko na hindi ako nakikita, na hindi ko sila nakakasama, na hindi nila ako kinikilalang ina, sa dahilang baka ikinahiya na nasa kulungan ako o baka nasanay na lang sila na wala ako. Madalas gusto ko na lang mamatay (My children grew up without seeing me or being with me. They do not recognize me as their mother, perhaps because they are embarrassed that I’m in prison or they just got used to living without me. Often, I just want to die).” Once a breadwinner, one mother recalled the effects of her arrest on her children and parents. “Dahil po sa aking pagkakulong, nagbagsakan ang grades at nagkasakit po ang mga anak ko dahil hindi ko po sila nakakasama. Naging pasaway na ang anak ko, nag-rebelde ang kaisipan nila at nahihirapan ang magulang ko dahil ako lang ang inaasahan ng aking pamilya at mga anak. Naaawa na po ako sa pamilya ko, naghihirap po sila sa labas (Because I was imprisoned, my children’s grades plummeted. Their health suffered since we were no longer together. They became rebellious and it became difficult for my parents since I was the only one they and my children relied on. I feel sorry for my family, they are having a difficult time outside).” Four FGD participants have children with special needs and are unaware of how their children are doing. Some of their relatives outside of prison end up having to care for these children and many of them find the extra care work 29